Today marks 19 years of occasionally screaming into the void, and I’m happy about that. The void is presumably less happy because it probably doesn’t like being screamed at but who cares, it’s just the void.
There are of course two reasons to be happy about doing something for 19 years. The first, and most basic, is that it means I’m still here. I’ve gone from being a rather bitter and cynical mid-30s guy who is pretty bad at video games to being a …actually kind of generally happy and positive mid-50s guy who is still, yes, pretty bad at video games.
Also in the last 19 years I have lost weight three times and only gained it back twice. Right now I am comfortably sitting at a BMI slightly over 21 and hoping I can keep it that way.
But nobody is here for diet tips! Let’s talk about a video game, and one featuring a character who is only slightly younger than me.
Back in October, when I’d just finished Silent Hill f and was looking for other spooky games to play, I settled on starting the Resident Evil series. Really, this was mostly because of the collaboration that Capcom had going with NIKKE, which I was playing daily at the time. I wanted to know who the characters were before I decided whether I was going to spend my precious limited currency on pulling for them.
Recently I haven’t really felt like logging into NIKKE that often, but Resident Evil kinda stuck. So I guess the collaboration worked out for Capcom. Weird.
Anyway, in the last five months I played all of the mainline RE games, started and dropped a few of the spin-offs, waffled about whether I was going to pay full price for the upcoming entry, and finally gave in and pre-ordered it when Fanatical had a roughly 20% discount on a Steam key. This marks the first time ever I have gotten to see a Steam game preload in encrypted form and unpack itself into playable files when the clock ticked over to release time.
Mind you, it unlocked at 9 PM Pacific time and my bedtime is usually 9:30 since I work really early, but I managed to keep my eyes open until a full hour after that to get some actual play in.
OK, OK, a good half hour of that was spent messing about with graphics options. It’s a PC game. You can’t just Press Any Button to Start. You need to decide what kind of tessellation you want.
Note: I don’t know what tessellation is.
BUT AFTER THAT ENTIRELY NECESSARY PROCESS, I got into it. And then I played for several hours every day until finishing it last night, only a few minutes before reading a completely unrelated Reddit thread where someone decided to randomly drop a rant involving huge late-game spoilers. I would have been very upset about reading that before experiencing them myself in the game, so I guess going a little over the top on play time was justified.
I will not drop spoilers here, or really get into the plot. I’ll just say that I quite enjoyed it, and then spend the rest of this post throwing in random screenshots and rambling on about the in-game computers. A large part of this game involves wandering around buildings that haven’t had any living inhabitants since 1998, so the computers on desks should reflect that time and I’m here to nit-pick how close Capcom came to getting it right.
Before that, though, the obligatory taxidermy raccoon appearance! This has been in every modern RE game starting with RE2 Remake and it took me an embarassingly long time before I understood why. It actually wasn’t until I said out loud “why is it always a raccoon?” and my ears heard the word “raccoon” and I finally got it.
And now on with the computers.
This oddly-squished PC/XT shows up a lot. Like, a LOT. It’s a little annoying how well it was modeled before someone on the team decided to scale it to about 60% of what an actual PC/XT would look like.
For the record, the case should be considerably wider than this monitor.
It’s difficult to see in this image, but it has the very common full-height floppy drive on one side and a half-height hard disk on the other side, with a plastic cover filling the empty space above the hard disk. This was probably an ST225, maybe a ST251 depending on how much budget the evil megacorporation had to throw at it… though considering they were stuck with machines of this vintage in 1998 it seems like they were really going cheap on IT.
The keyboard and mouse are also pretty anachronistic. That’s a PC/AT keyboard, and mice were pretty uncommon on XT-class machines. Not to mention, it has a scroll wheel.
Finally, the display looks like EGA or potentially VGA. Again, something that you COULD have squeezed into an XT… but it would be pretty unlikely.
Mind you, I did have a VGA card in my 10 Mhz XT clone back in the day. So I can certify that it was possible.
On the other hand, or rather the other side, things go all wrong.
Kudos to the designer for remembering the weird power output on the PC/XT power supply. For people who weren’t around at the time, the idea was that you plugged your computer into mains power and then your monitor into your computer, so you only had one power cable.
It also gets the normal I/O for a PC of the time. You have a DB25 parallel port, a DB9 serial port, and something that is probably a DB15 port for a joystick. Kinda weird to see that last on a PC being used in a corporate environment, but that was a typical combo card for a PC/XT-class machine. It probably also had a floppy controller and a battery-backed clock on the board.
On the other hand, there is no video output here. I mean, I’ll forgive them for not modeling the cables but there is absolutely nowhere to even connect a monitor. You would occasionally see Hercules graphics cards that included other I/O ports, and you could make an argument that maybe that’s the card we’re seeing here… but Hercules graphics was definitively monochrome.
So 8/10 front, 5/10 back. Moving on.
This Optiplex-looking thing shows up a few times as well and is WAY more in line with what you’d expect for 1998. One notable detail is the 3.5″ bay filled with a combo audio output / USB port insert. Pretty sure I had one of this exact type. 10/10 front.
Other interesting things here include a little PC tower that looks kinda like a period-appropriate Compaq Presario. I didn’t notice it at the time of taking this screenshot, or I would have actually gotten it in the flashlight beam. There’s something that looks kinda like a modern NAS but with no drives installed, and a return of the weird janky three-drive-bay PC previously seen at the end of RE4 Remake. Better shot of that below.
Yeah. This thing. Under the generic black desktop. We saw this in RE4 Remake and it is like nothing I’ve ever seen in real life. Since the computers in the modern RE games all seem to be modeled after real-world computers, I desperately want to know what this thing is based on. I assume it was only sold in Japan.
Proportions are a little squished on it as well, but it looks like a half-height floppy above a half-height hard disk, then a slot-loading optical drive to the right. This isn’t exactly the same 3d model we saw in RE4, because…
That version had 5.25″ and 3.5″ floppies on the left. Oh, and the NAS-looking thing in Requiem actually made an appearance here. The IIgs mouse doesn’t show up in Requiem though.
I’m not going to say much about the generic black desktop other than to say that it really doesn’t look period appropriate but since you don’t ever see it hooked up to a monitor and keyboard it may not actually be intended to be a computer. It could just be some other piece of random evil electronics.
The back of the tower isn’t bad.
This has a considerably more-reasonable complement of I/O ports. No motherboard video, which is good – it would have been entirely out of place in a 1998 PC. Presumably one of the add-on boards has a video output.
My first nit to pick is that this has entirely too many USB ports for 1998. It also only has a PS/2 keyboard port, where you’d typically have seen PS/2 ports for both keyboard AND mouse, and six channel audio was definitely not the norm. 7.5/10 for the back side.
Maybe Umbrella was finally getting around to replacing their XTs when they bought these things, and whoever was in charge of procurement was like, “OK, I had to make IBMs from 1984 last for over a decade, I am going to buy some high end stuff now because who knows when I’ll get to upgrade again…”
I like that. In fact, that’s my new mental canon from now on. Umbrella just has a painfully long refresh cycle on desktops. Back side now 9/10.
Also, interestingly enough, this particular evil megacorporation lab was all in on PCs. In Resident Evils 2 and 3, also set in 1998-era buildings, you saw a lot of Macs on desks. Those are completely gone in Requiem. So the procurement guy was a bit of a snob in that regard.
Whatever. PC/XTs, towers, some sort of weird presumably-Japanese-exclusive PC, these aren’t too weird. Right?
This is.
It’s hard to tell because every time you see this model it’s covered in dust but I swear to God that this is meant to be an Amiga 1000. There’s one ruined office building you crawl through where every desk with a computer on it is sporting an Amiga 1000. This is surreal, and possibly less likely than viruses that mutate people into 20-foot-tall snake monsters.
But then, this is Resident Evil and the science is highly questionable. As an example, part of the crafting system involves tracking down blood samples and analyzing them. Reasonable, if what you’re crafting is biological in nature…
…less reasonable when analyzing a blood sample teaches you how to make bullets.
Anyway, it was good! I think my top 5 modern RE games are now RE4 Remake, RE2 Remake, Requiem, RE6 and Village, more or less in that order though there is some potential for positions to change as I think about it.
Also I am very much looking forward to seeing some story DLC. Something the same scale as RE4’s Separate Ways would be awesome, but I’ll take smaller RE7-style DLCs if that’s what I can get.













































